13 Epic Responses to Awkward Chinese New Year Questions in Singapore

Published on Jan 22, 2020

Happy Chinese New Year!

Happy Chinese New Year GIF

As much as it is a joyous occasion for many, CNY also comes with relatives who are sure to ask those pesky and invasive questions about your love and personal life. Want to shut them up with something epic? 

Stylists from our favourite salons share with us some responses they've heard from customers!

1. Get a good same-sex friend to hug you and say you're married to him/her already


I've got quite a number of young students who posted IG Stories with their best buddies, calling them their wife.That is sure to stun some older-fashioned relatives into silence.~ Nich, Impulse Collective
Braided Hair

Even better, bring your best friend along to your family gathering!

But be warned that if you come from a conservative family, this might bring even MORE nagging.

So... do it with care.

2. Download photos from stock photo and say you're in a long term relationship with an overseas ang moh


Want to do something that's seemingly safer and that doesn't require you to physically bring an additional person along? Just pull up your phone and show them a stock photo of a hot ang moh with you photoshopped into it.

Couples
Just make sure the ang moh isn't tooooooo recognizable, or else the lie will unravel too quickly!~ Annette, Mode Studio

3. Redirect the arrow to another relative


Don't do to others what you don't want others to do to you.~ Evane, Pro Trim @ Takashimaya

If they ask about your love life, ask them about their children's private lives in return. If they ask how much money you earn, respond with a detailed inquiry on their savings.

4. Show them videos about veganism and environmental change and tell them that you intend to dedicate your life to changing the world


Shoving your opinions in someone's face isn't normally the go-to approach, but in this scenario, it's definitely effective.

Since climate change is so apparent and the health of the Earth is rapidly decreasing, take the time to enlighten everyone about the stare of global warming and the steps that they can do to help save the world.~ Tiffany from Picasso Hair Studio

via GIPHY

5. Show them funny YouTube videos / IGTV to change topic


If you cannot get rid of them, distract them!~ Don from Focus Hairdressing

YouTube, Instagram, Sgag, TikTok... Whatever your poison is, just take out your phone and start showing everyone funny videos to distract them. If they aren't entertained, just keep laughing to yourself until they disperse.

Problem solved.

6. Pretend to be so engaged in Mobile Legends (or other handphone games), you can't hear them


Yes, this is possible the most anti-social response, but you gotta do what you gotta do sometimes.

If you want to feel nice, show them how to play with face filters on IG or even introduce some games to them~ Chris from Act Point Salon

We think this SG$50 note filter is particularly suitable for CNY.

$50 Singapore Note Funny Filter

7. Flip your hair and say, my hair nice or not?


The other way to do it is to do a hair flip and change the topic blatantly. ~ Shinice from Koinonia Salon
Hair Colour - Fiery Red

Dye your hair fire engine red and talk about the process of getting your hair there. 

Natural Brown Highlights by Koinonia Salon

Highlights at Koinonia Salon

Even if your hair isn't that vibrant, you can still do a hair flip and make them envious of your luscious big gorgeous hair. 

Psst, there's still time and we even have a list of salons that have no CNY surcharge.

8. Admit that you actually have a relationship... with food


Rub your tummy and then proceed to stuff new year goodies in your mouth and talk about how nice yummy the cookie is.~ Zen from Mane Made

via GIPHY

9. Share that you are focused on getting a significant income before finding a significant other.


Not that comfortable to talk about love? Switch to a topic you actually want to talk about: $$$~ Ivy from Do My Hair
Tony Stark Money

If you're an insurance / property agent, use the opportunity to tell them about how busy you are and proceed to ask if they need any assistance.

Many will probably stop bugging you after this. 

10. Show them your astrology reading and say that there's no chance for love this year


Since there are a ton of superstitions anyway, why not add another one?

Talk about your fortune star, romance star and other astrology facts that will either puzzle or satisfy them. Either way, you'll be free to do whatever you want because "the stars are not in your favour now".~ Fion from 99 Percent Hair Studio

You can even show them what their lucky hair colour is and what 2020 holds for each of the Chinese Zodiac sign here.

11. Ask them to lend you money


A sure way to get someone to scram? Talk about your financial status and hint or blatantly ask them for help.~ Calvin, Full House Salon

Most of the time, those nosey relatives will just start inching away.

Chinese New Year Conversations Meme

12. Show them photos of your many cats


It's okay to be a cat lady in your 30s... or even your 20s. ~ Wenny from No. 8 Hair Studio
Cat Couple

13. I'm afraid my relationship will end up like yours


Smirk Smile GIF

Ouch, harsh.

Maybe withhold this unless there's someone you seriously can't stand?

Don't try this with relatives you are not close to... and make sure they know how to take a joke!~ Esther from Gene by Ginrich

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